Plot twist: the ultimatum was about kicking their son out
Gonna point out this post is from over a decade ago
Things were still pretty bad back then, but people did still typically move out of their parents’ place at that point
My older brother is 28 and still with us… 🤷♂️
My mom said shit like: “[some random friend/relative] is only 21 and already graduated college and gotten married and have a kid (which means presumably they have their own separate house), why are y’all [directed at me and my older brother] such failures?”
(I’m Chinese American btw)
Graduating and marriage at 21 is crazy
Normal graduation is around 21 to 23, assuming you went immediately from high school to college (at least in the states)
So that means they basically got married during college, which sounds crazy to me, and somehow can afford a house at less than a year’s worth of a normal job schedule, assuming they started right when they graduated.
They could have gotten a two-year certificate from a trade school or one of the few associates degrees that is sufficient to get yourself a job in the field.
Idk why but in my parent’s social circle… everyone seem to be some type of successful small bussiness owner and own several rentals or a bunch of stocks or like doing international trade or whatever…
Like one of my aunts owns a 4 family home in Brooklyn and lease two of them out and combined two units on the 1st floor into 1… her husband is a college professor and has a real estate license… and also a bunch of trade licenses…
(this is not the “married at 21 and have kids” story, its a different story)
they have so much video game consoles at home…
Their kids constantly go to some PAID afterschool thing and weekend school… (from what I heard)
And I assume they also had to go to Chinese school since I’ve been told they learned Chinese? (lolol I didn’t have to cuz I actually went to 2nd grade in China so I already knew how to read)
Like… literally the stereotypical Asian family… BUT THEY HAVE VIDEO GAME CONSOLES AND I DIDNT EVEN GET ANY WTF MOM?
So I was told this cousin, around my age, apparantly went to go on to do international bussiness and “made millions of dollars” like early 20s…
Nah I think they’re exaggerating…
Their mom and dad (the mom is my aunt, who is my dad’s sister) owns real estate I think…
I mean they used to have one in Philly and they asked my dad and mom to do property management for them… but later they sold it cuz its was too far and too much of a hassle…
And my mom also have another friend (old classmate? or like and old teacher she used to have?) in Philly that owns like 5 rentals…
Like my parents social circle is so weird…
like everyone is just “middle class” and if you are just living paycheck to paycheck, you lose “face”…
Like I think the vast majority of Chinese immigrants own their homes…
So not owning a home is actually considered a failure lol…
All that at 21 is crazy. I am barely at uni at 19
I read somewhere that like 60 percent of adults under 30 still live with their parents. You should ask your mom how her generation screwed up everything for their kids.
Two of my kids live with us, between 25 and 30. Our third (in that age range) lives with his biological dad. Though part of that is for health reasons.
Her generation…
Well I mean…
Mao’s little red books intensifies
(okay jokes aside, I was told my generation was “supposed” to have it better than theirs… in terms of like them growing up in Mainland China 60s/70s vs me having the opportunity to emigrate during childhood… but maybe I just got very bad luck and mom got extremely lucky in terms of “being successful in life”)
Just gesture vaguely to the world around you.
Mom: “I grew up with nothing, your grandparents didn’t give us anything, yet look at how much I’ve built [they have like a few hundred thousand to possibly 1 mill USD in assets], why can’t you do the same?”
And funny thing is she also admitted that luck is part of the equation, but then still shamed us anyways…
Like she often points to my cousin around my age that apprantly is doing some bussiness stuff overseas and made millions in profits…
And like
Oh this is funny:
“Look at NYC! An IMMIGRANT BECAME MAYOR! [she’s talking about Mamdani] You came here at 8 years old, why can’t you be just like him?”
😭
Idk mom, Mamdani’s mom seems nicer than you… maybe that’s why… lmfao
throw it back at her how lousy of a parent she was. win your arguments if you want to stop hearing it.
I’m so sorry to hear of what you and your brother have been going through. It’s not your fault, it’s not his fault, it’s not the fault of so many other countless young adults who have far fewer opportunities.
I, and many other older folks, are rooting for you. Hang in there and go easy on yourselves.
You are our future.
Boomers complaining about their kids not moving out like theyre not the ones responsible for this shitty housing market.
Nah, it’s billionaires. Silent gen billionaires, boomer billionaires, gen x billionaires, millenial billionaires. Billionaires all the way down.
But for a large part boomers buying in to the billionaires propaganda and voting in favor of the billionaires
If you let only Gen X and Millenials vote in 2024, Trump would have won, too.
That’s early for Spanish to move out
Fr, i choose to interpret this as “my parents let me live with them because of the super shitty housing and unemployment crisis here, but they’re splitting up, now I’ll have to figure out who to support with rent + chores.” Or “Now I’ll have to figure out who will live in a nicer area and move in with them.”
Even if it’s not as traumatic as a kid break-up i think it would still be very unpleasant to have to live with that level of bickering.
